Alopecia Diagnosis
I often wish my natural hair story started with this desire to challenge society’s beauty standard by wanting to wear and embrace my natural hair texture, but it’s actually something I stubbled upon while trying to save my hair. In 2017, I noticed my hair was thinning and by October 2018 I was diagnosed with Alopecia. This was the only picture I took at the onset of my diagnosis.
Over time, I had developed a very thin crown area to the point where you could see my scalp. I was very conscientious about it. I would try to cover it by flipping my hair over or bumping the roots of my hair but nothing was successful. I didn’t know what to do to save my hair and it didn’t even occur to me to stop straightening my hair.
I depended on my Dermatologist to tell me what to do but after running a blood test and determining it wasn’t a vitamin deficiency I was just left with “your hair loss is hereditary”. I couldn’t come to terms with this. I was determined to save my hair and revive my crown area that was thinning more and more each week when I straightened my hair. I researched constantly and many of the resources I found spoke about wearing your natural hair.
My Straight Hair
Wearing my natural hair sounded daunting to me because I hadn’t worn my natural hair since I was a child. I was so attached to my straight hair because it made me feel beautiful and presentable. I never realized the damage I was doing to my hair and to my self-confidence.
Transitioning
Although I was attached to my straight hair, I knew I had to do something different, so I decided to transition to natural in an attempt to save my hair. Transitioning was hard because I didn’t have a curl in sight. I had trained my hair to be straight. I straightened it weekly and refreshed it daily. I had damaged my curl pattern greatly. I also had no idea how to care for my scalp or natural hair. Before going natural, I purchased products that would dry out my hair. I didn’t deep condition at all or put moisturizing products in my hair because I didn’t want to weight down my “flowy” straight hair.
My Coily Hair
Wearing my natural hair sounded daunting to me because I hadn’t worn my natural hair since I was a child. I never learned how to care for my coils. I was so attached to my straight hair because it made me feel beautiful. Society had convinced me that my hair needed to be straight to be accepted and to be beautiful. I was always complimented for my long, straight hair, but when I wore my natural hair I was made to feel it wasn’t “done” and acceptable. I never realized the damage I was allowing to happen to my self-confidence for being who I was naturally.
Now, that I have gone through transitioning my hair I have been forced to look within myself and answer the hard questions as to why I felt I needed to straighten my hair, what is wrong with my hair in its natural state, why do you feel uncomfortable being naturally you? This journey of unpacking has led me to feel more confident than ever. I am ok wearing the hair that God intended for me to have and care for. Why should I be afraid of this?
No one should feel ashamed or be penalized for wearing the hair that naturally grows out of their head, so now I not only wear my natural hair because it makes me feel beautiful, but I want to be a part of the change that normalizes natural hair, challenging beauty standards for the next generation. We should never be made to feel we need to alter ourselves to be accepted. Let’s choose to embrace our textured hair as an act of self-love and acceptance!
